Fathers: Career Highlights Won't Be On Your Tombstone
By Dave Kerpen
Last Sunday morning, at 8:25 AM, I stood at Gate B5 in Memphis,
Tennessee, tears streaming down my face as I
watched my flight home to New York
take off.
I had been delayed by weather on a connecting flight from Nashville, and had
arrived to the gate just two minutes after the doors had closed.
So I watched
the plane leave, standing there, knowing that I would be re-routed through
Atlanta now and instead of getting home before noon, I wouldn't be home until
5PM. I would miss the entire weekend with my family, and I was devastated.
I had begrudgingly accepted a business trip to Nashville even though it was a Wednesday
through a Saturday because it was an excellent opportunity with an important
business partner.
And although weekends were typically sacred with my family, I
had decided to sacrifice Daddy-daughter Saturday morning dance class this time,
knowing I'd be home Sunday morning.
But when I missed that flight, I missed camp orientation, and had lost the
entire weekend with my kids. I fell apart emotionally. I felt so disappointed
in myself. I felt so out of control. I felt like I had made a really bad
decision to not be home for a weekend. I felt like the worst dad in the world.
During the next seven hours of travel, I had a lot of time to think and
reflect upon my priorities.
I thought about my incredible day with the late, great Senator Frank
Lautenberg, who taught me that my greatest legacy would be my children.
I
thought about the famous quote from John Crudele: "How do children
spell LOVE? T-I-M-E."
I thought about my priorities.
It's easy to get caught up in our hectic careers.
It's easy for men and
women to become "busy" trying to advance up the ladder at work or
build a successful company.
It's easy to check your email, take that meeting or
call, or attend that networking event the boss invited you too.
It's all too
easy to skip the family dinner in the name of helping to put dinner on the
table.
Somehow, it's more difficult at times to say "no" to our client or
boss than it is to say "no" to our children.
But as Senator
Lautenberg taught me, your career highlights won't be on your tombstone.
Your kids' names will be.
You'll never regret time with your kids. You'll never say on your
deathbed, "I wish I had worked more."
I have a lot of career goals and dreams.
I want to build meaningful
companies that change the world.
I want to one day run for public office.
I
want to teach, to speak, to invest and to inspire.
But I'm not willing to
sacrifice weekends with my kids.
That's my choice, and of course it's your choice to pursue your career and
your goals and dreams as vigorously as you'd like.
But my hope, as we celebrate Father's Day in the US,
is that you'll find it a little bit easier to say no to that next weekend
conference, evening networking event, or breakfast meeting.
My hope is that
you'll find it easier to say yes to the kids.
Just think about that eventual
deathbed or tombstone, and how you'll feel one day looking back.
By the way, while I was devastated to miss the whole weekend with the kids,
I'm proud to report that I canceled three evening work activities this week, to
spend those evenings with my daughters.
The week culminated in an excellent
game of RISK, pictured above.
And the only world I needed to take over was two
little girls' world.
Happy Father's Day, and enjoy that time with your children!
-----
Now
it's your turn. How do you balance your career
with your family? How do you determine what to
say "Yes" to and what to say "No" to at work? What kind of
father (or mother) do you want to be
remembered as? Please let me know your thoughts in the
Comments section below. And please do share this post with the fathers (and
mothers) in YOUR network
0 comments:
Post a Comment