Thursday, December 17, 2015

What Goes Around ........

I am certainly sure that you would have heard this slogan "What goes around,  comes around" but I do not know if you have actually observed it in real life situations.

Well I have and not just once or twice but many times over.

I just want to share one of such times with you

When we were young and impressionable, I had a class mate and good friend of mine; we were quite close.

In one of our numerous tales, he told me of his Uncle who at 42 was still unmarried and who was still not in a hurry to marry. He said that the Family members had asked him severally why he was not yet married and he always gave the excuse of training his siblings in order for them to stand on their own feet, so that when he finally gets married he would not have to share his resources between his own immediate family members and his extended family members which might be a source of attrition.

(By the way, that Uncle of his was the first of his Father's children, the only one that had been trained to University level before his Father died and the man had 9 Children)

He said that he personally believed that the man was not being truthful and that there was much more to him not being married at 42 than he was letting.

Well, eventually that Uncle of his got married on the eve of the last of his Sisters (also the last born) graduating from the University.

My friend and I pursued our various interests in form of career and profession and did not meet up again until so many years afterwards.

When we eventually caught up again (thanks to social media), I learnt that he had gone ahead to become a Chartered Accountant (a brilliant one at that) but he filled me in with the details of what travails he had passed through.

Immediately after our School Certificate Examination, he was shipped out of Nigeria to continue with his studies but within 18 months of his studies, his father died, things became difficult for him and he was faced with the choice of continuing or abandoning his studies; he said he chose to continue with the studies and had to do odd jobs to survive.

Eventually he graduated and the responsibility of training his siblings fell squarely in his shoulders (by the way, my friend is the first of his Father's children and the man had 8 children).

So, when he qualified as an Accountant, he had to pick up a job to be able to fund the academic activities of his siblings and also study to be Chartered.  Eventually years and time took their toll on him that by the time he was through with paying School fees for his siblings, he was 43 and unmarried.

He told me that before then he had received emissaries from his mother and family members asking him why he was not married and he gave the answers that he was trying to settle his siblings before doing so.

On hearing that from him, I burst out laughing, and in his dismay, he asked me why I was laughing at him, I took him back 45 years ago when we had the same conversation about his Uncle who did not marry even when he was 42; and he hit his forehead and said "oh now I remember"

And he said "with the benefit of hindsight, I think my Uncle said things as they were to him then"

Having had the same experience, we both agreed that one should not be quick in judging others based on their own sentiments because in this world, nothing is as it seems and what goes around surely has a way of coming around.

You can make that choice too and today is the day to start

What do you think?
Have you had a similar experience and do you care to share?

Let's read you here, do use the comment box below

Be Blessed

Dr. Jerry - the First: JP



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