I Walked Out Of A Meeting And Never Came Back

Well, I didn’t quit. It was worse than that. 

It was the middle of a meeting. I was bored out of my mind. Plus I was nervous because my new boss told me “don’t worry about it” when I asked about a raise. 

“Don’t worry about it” means “**** you.”

And my leg hurt. I had fallen the day before on the way to my lunch with my work friends.

So in the middle of the meeting, I excused myself for the bathroom. I limped out. I said goodbye to the receptionist. I didn’t take my coat, my bag, or any of books. My name might still be on my door.

I took the elevator 49 floors down. I went up to Grand Central, took the train 70 miles north. I never went back to work.

They tried calling me and emailing me. Even many years later I got an email from the boss saying, “we’d still love to have you”.

I never responded to any of the emails or calls, even that last one. You can judge me. It wasn’t the most ethical way to leave a job. And I’m not very good at confrontation.

But sometimes it’s too much. Sometimes all the BS adds up until you can’t move anymore, until you can’t get out of bed.

What’s so bad, honey?... says my imaginary friend who loves me every day.

A) For every dollar of value I create, 50-80 percent of it is eaten by the boss or his boss, or his boss, or some machine.

B) For every dollar I take home, 40 percent is taken by the government, 10 percent is taken by healthcare, and another few percent is taken by transportation to work.

C) I was deluded into thinking my work friends were real friends. At work: everyone backstabs all the time.

D) If I talk to anyone of the opposite sex I have to read three manuals and sign forms in triplicate with HR to make sure it’s ok.

E) When I’m trying to impress clients I have to pretend to like them.

F) For breakfast and lunch I’m eating nothing but junk food while I’m in between meetings that crush my soul.

G) From 6 a.m. until about 8 p.m. I’m either getting ready for work, going to work, at work, or coming home from work. For potentially 50 years.

H) My wife could care less about any job I have. And after awhile we forget why we met, why we fell in love, until finally there’s a stranger lying next to me in bed for the rest of my life. 40 years later you die next to a stranger.

I) Every dollar I spent on education was to build the safety net just in case I “fell”. Guess what: A job is what I “fell” into.

J) If my boss yells at me all I can do is apologize. I used to leave the building and go to the bottom of the NY Public Library and just wait to get calm.

I mapped out all the public bathrooms in a six block radius. Nobody wants to pee next to their boss. It’s disgusting and humiliating.

We were given our hands to love and create. To touch and inspire.

Find real meaning in your life instead of a means to some financial goal or pleasure.

When you find meaning that delivers value, art, and helps others fulfill their own dreams, you find happiness.

That happiness is what gets you out of bed in the morning. What allows you to make real meaningful connections with other people. What allows you to create the world that you always aspired you would live in.

You were once a little boy. You played in a sandbox with your friends. You loved people and built castles.

Now go. Now go play again. The world is filled with meaning. Find yours.

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